A Good Man
Guest Post from my husband...
"You're a good man." "You're a better man than I." "I'm glad there are people out there like you."
As I have shared our desire to adopt, especially a special needs child, with friends at work or elsewhere I often hear some of the responses above. It is a bit awkward when I hear these statements because I don't think of myself as a "good man". Let me explain myself by sharing a bit of my testimony. I was raised in a Baptist church, basically 9 months before I was born I was listening to songs sung from either the Church Hymnal or the Baptist Hymnal. At a young age I had seen a couple of my friends make decisions of faith in Christ. One night while my dad was reading his Bible I told him I wanted to be saved but I really didn't understand at that time what I was doing even with him explaining it to me. For many years I leaned on this "experience" as my salvation but in almost every church service I attended I never had peace...there was always this doubt in my mind. In August of 2001, I finally decided enough was enough so I swallowed my pride and admitted that I had never truly trusted in Christ. I repented and decided to follow Jesus that night and gained a peace I'd never had before. As time went on I began to settle into a comfortable Christianity where I spend my time and money on whatever I want and give God a small piece calling it "sacrifice". Fast forward a few years to meeting and marrying Donna. She's the godly woman I had prayed for years earlier but thought I would never find. God has His perfect timing.
Kids
Before getting married I really hadn't given much thought to having kids and really didn't care if we had kids or not...basically indifferent. One day I was really convicted around having children and continuing to use brith control that has a potential of basically causing an abortion. This was out of nowhere but from that day forward I wanted a child. Soon after we had our first child and less than two years after he was born we welcomed our daughter to our family. I went from not caring if we had kids to loving my two little children ...that wasn't me, that was God working in me. God has taught me so much through my kids and Donna.
Over the last year God has really began working in my heart like never before. I have began to wonder if I am truly "following Christ". If the majority of my life is spent at work and the rest of my time is spent on Facebook, thinking about buying more "stuff" and not giving God but only a Sunday and a bit more, I knew something just wasn't right. Donna and I made the decision earlier this year to take a break from Facebook and try to focus on things that really matter. We began reading the Bible together in the morning and praying before I left for work. We had talked about adoption from early on in our relationship but to be honest, that was one of those "I'll say what I think she wants to hear but knowing it'll never happen moments". Adopting was scary to me and why would we want to adopt if we can have children? But again, God was working in my heart and I began to have a desire to adopt. So then it was the question of where would we adopt from? My initial thought was on domestic adoption and I made up an excuse for why I didn't think I could handle a special needs child. Same story here...God was changing my heart. Friends from church had either gone through international adoption or was going through the process. This didn't sway me too much as I don't follow the crowd too often and definitely don't like to step out of a big comfort zone like that. One day while randomly scrolling through the guide on TV, I noticed a program on the Ukraine and since friends at church had adopted from the Ukraine I was intrigued. It was about orphans and the different situations they are placed into and the hard times they go through. This big tough guy that had just spent the day busting up firewood was broken hearted for these children. I began doing research about adopting from the Ukraine and really felt lead to adopt there. Soon after I was looking at two children who needed a family and one of them has a special need...special needs no longer bothered me.
God has changed this old cold and callus heart; I am a different man because of Christ, not because of any "good" I naturally have within me. I am nowhere near perfect and God is constantly working on me. I know things are not going to be easy and things may not work as we plan them but I will trust God and praise Him in good times and bad. Donna admitted that she has been praying along the way for almost all of these things so never doubt the power of a praying wife.
Not sure I will ever "blog" again but who knows...
"You're a good man." "You're a better man than I." "I'm glad there are people out there like you."
As I have shared our desire to adopt, especially a special needs child, with friends at work or elsewhere I often hear some of the responses above. It is a bit awkward when I hear these statements because I don't think of myself as a "good man". Let me explain myself by sharing a bit of my testimony. I was raised in a Baptist church, basically 9 months before I was born I was listening to songs sung from either the Church Hymnal or the Baptist Hymnal. At a young age I had seen a couple of my friends make decisions of faith in Christ. One night while my dad was reading his Bible I told him I wanted to be saved but I really didn't understand at that time what I was doing even with him explaining it to me. For many years I leaned on this "experience" as my salvation but in almost every church service I attended I never had peace...there was always this doubt in my mind. In August of 2001, I finally decided enough was enough so I swallowed my pride and admitted that I had never truly trusted in Christ. I repented and decided to follow Jesus that night and gained a peace I'd never had before. As time went on I began to settle into a comfortable Christianity where I spend my time and money on whatever I want and give God a small piece calling it "sacrifice". Fast forward a few years to meeting and marrying Donna. She's the godly woman I had prayed for years earlier but thought I would never find. God has His perfect timing.
Kids
Before getting married I really hadn't given much thought to having kids and really didn't care if we had kids or not...basically indifferent. One day I was really convicted around having children and continuing to use brith control that has a potential of basically causing an abortion. This was out of nowhere but from that day forward I wanted a child. Soon after we had our first child and less than two years after he was born we welcomed our daughter to our family. I went from not caring if we had kids to loving my two little children ...that wasn't me, that was God working in me. God has taught me so much through my kids and Donna.
Over the last year God has really began working in my heart like never before. I have began to wonder if I am truly "following Christ". If the majority of my life is spent at work and the rest of my time is spent on Facebook, thinking about buying more "stuff" and not giving God but only a Sunday and a bit more, I knew something just wasn't right. Donna and I made the decision earlier this year to take a break from Facebook and try to focus on things that really matter. We began reading the Bible together in the morning and praying before I left for work. We had talked about adoption from early on in our relationship but to be honest, that was one of those "I'll say what I think she wants to hear but knowing it'll never happen moments". Adopting was scary to me and why would we want to adopt if we can have children? But again, God was working in my heart and I began to have a desire to adopt. So then it was the question of where would we adopt from? My initial thought was on domestic adoption and I made up an excuse for why I didn't think I could handle a special needs child. Same story here...God was changing my heart. Friends from church had either gone through international adoption or was going through the process. This didn't sway me too much as I don't follow the crowd too often and definitely don't like to step out of a big comfort zone like that. One day while randomly scrolling through the guide on TV, I noticed a program on the Ukraine and since friends at church had adopted from the Ukraine I was intrigued. It was about orphans and the different situations they are placed into and the hard times they go through. This big tough guy that had just spent the day busting up firewood was broken hearted for these children. I began doing research about adopting from the Ukraine and really felt lead to adopt there. Soon after I was looking at two children who needed a family and one of them has a special need...special needs no longer bothered me.
God has changed this old cold and callus heart; I am a different man because of Christ, not because of any "good" I naturally have within me. I am nowhere near perfect and God is constantly working on me. I know things are not going to be easy and things may not work as we plan them but I will trust God and praise Him in good times and bad. Donna admitted that she has been praying along the way for almost all of these things so never doubt the power of a praying wife.
Not sure I will ever "blog" again but who knows...
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