Worth every struggle
When we brought Katya home from the orphanage almost two years ago, we didn't know what obstacles she'd have to overcome. While it is true that Katya has been through a whole lot, I don't want her to have to rely on us for everything. My desire is to watch her flourish and become as independent as possible.
Obstacle #1:Dressing
About a year ago, I decided it was time for Katya to learn to completely dress herself (including her undergarments, braces and shoes.) We worked on it for a week before she was able to do it by herself. It took an hour each time. The next day, I told her that I wanted her to do it all by herself. When it got hard, she started crying. I attempted to talk her through it, but she wouldn't have it. She wanted me to do it. I knew she was capable so I stayed strong and continued to encourage her. She sat there crying, spitting, & screaming while doing nothing, for what seemed so long, but eventually she did it. We went through this every day for a month. Then one day she was able to do it with no problem.
Obstacle #2:Walking
Walking hasn't come easy. In early 2015, Katya received her first set of braces. The surgery she had the following year made it possible for her feet to be braced. With her feet braced, she now had the hope of walking. But learning to walk was hard work. We started out weight bearing. Some days it was so hard.
In the spring of 2015, Katya started using a walker at physical therapy with help. She had to have help to push the walker. Our therapists asked me to work with her on her steps at home. As I worked with her, I realized that she was able to push that walker. So we worked hard on it. There was a lot of crying, spitting and screaming. A few days later she was doing it like a pro. The next week at therapy, she was able to walk with the walker unaided. A few weeks later she was walking from the car to the inside of therapy. This wouldn't have happened if she wasn't pushed to try harder.
Obstacle #3:Swimming
Last year we put Katya in the pool with a "puddle-jumper" on, she immediately went under. She couldn't balance herself. By the end of the summer she was much better. We had heard that many people with her condition were able to become very good swimmers. So in March of this year, Katya began taking weekly swimming lessons. By week five she was swimming! We were so proud of her. But that wasn't the hard part. The obstacle was getting her to come up and actually take a breath. We worked for weeks and weeks with no results. Once her grandmother's pool was open, we began to practice in between lessons. The first time she acted terrible to me, screaming and demanding to get out of the pool. She never acted like this with her instructor, only with me. The next time we tried, it was worse, she spit in my face multiple times and called me stupid. But she did eventually swim while breathing. Daddy had a long talk with her. She told me that she was sorry and that next time she "pinky" promised daddy that she would not act bad. At lessons a few days later she did amazing! She swam over and over breathing each time. Today, I was brave enough to try working with her again. She swam almost the entire length of the pool, which was about 23 feet!!! No screams, spits or cries only her laughter and praises from me. I'm amazed. Simply amazed.
The reason I'm writing this tonight is to encourage others. True progress only comes with a price. It doesn't come freely, you have to work hard for it. Even for those helping us along the way. As a mother, I have to often be the "bad" one, when I push my kids to try harder. But seeing the results, is worth every struggle. I love Katya and I am so proud to be her mother.
Obstacle #1:Dressing
About a year ago, I decided it was time for Katya to learn to completely dress herself (including her undergarments, braces and shoes.) We worked on it for a week before she was able to do it by herself. It took an hour each time. The next day, I told her that I wanted her to do it all by herself. When it got hard, she started crying. I attempted to talk her through it, but she wouldn't have it. She wanted me to do it. I knew she was capable so I stayed strong and continued to encourage her. She sat there crying, spitting, & screaming while doing nothing, for what seemed so long, but eventually she did it. We went through this every day for a month. Then one day she was able to do it with no problem.
Obstacle #2:Walking
Walking hasn't come easy. In early 2015, Katya received her first set of braces. The surgery she had the following year made it possible for her feet to be braced. With her feet braced, she now had the hope of walking. But learning to walk was hard work. We started out weight bearing. Some days it was so hard.
In the spring of 2015, Katya started using a walker at physical therapy with help. She had to have help to push the walker. Our therapists asked me to work with her on her steps at home. As I worked with her, I realized that she was able to push that walker. So we worked hard on it. There was a lot of crying, spitting and screaming. A few days later she was doing it like a pro. The next week at therapy, she was able to walk with the walker unaided. A few weeks later she was walking from the car to the inside of therapy. This wouldn't have happened if she wasn't pushed to try harder.
Obstacle #3:Swimming
Last year we put Katya in the pool with a "puddle-jumper" on, she immediately went under. She couldn't balance herself. By the end of the summer she was much better. We had heard that many people with her condition were able to become very good swimmers. So in March of this year, Katya began taking weekly swimming lessons. By week five she was swimming! We were so proud of her. But that wasn't the hard part. The obstacle was getting her to come up and actually take a breath. We worked for weeks and weeks with no results. Once her grandmother's pool was open, we began to practice in between lessons. The first time she acted terrible to me, screaming and demanding to get out of the pool. She never acted like this with her instructor, only with me. The next time we tried, it was worse, she spit in my face multiple times and called me stupid. But she did eventually swim while breathing. Daddy had a long talk with her. She told me that she was sorry and that next time she "pinky" promised daddy that she would not act bad. At lessons a few days later she did amazing! She swam over and over breathing each time. Today, I was brave enough to try working with her again. She swam almost the entire length of the pool, which was about 23 feet!!! No screams, spits or cries only her laughter and praises from me. I'm amazed. Simply amazed.
The reason I'm writing this tonight is to encourage others. True progress only comes with a price. It doesn't come freely, you have to work hard for it. Even for those helping us along the way. As a mother, I have to often be the "bad" one, when I push my kids to try harder. But seeing the results, is worth every struggle. I love Katya and I am so proud to be her mother.
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