Our Adoption Journey: 2nd Trip
Day 1: I'm back in Ukraine, my second home! I'm amazed at how well my traveling went. I had a couple of huge gifts from God today. The first was that I wasn't charged for the double stroller I checked in. The lady at the check in counter asked me where the kids were to go in the stroller. I told her that I was adopting two children and that I needed it for the return travel. She asked me what country I was adopting from. Then she went to the back to get a large bag to put the stroller in. At that point she said "I'm your new best friend. I'm supposed to charge you but under the circumstances I'll let this one slide". I was so thankful! That was $100 saved. I flew from Atlanta to Frankfurt and then from Frankfurt to Kiev. I had no delays or complications the entire trip. When I made it to Kiev, our facilitator was there to pick me up. My second huge gift from God was at the hotel. As I was checking in, I decided to go ahead and tell them that I would have two children with me later this week. I asked if that was ok. She said that as long as they were under 12 that was fine (no extra charge.) Then I asked about a crib. She said that it would be better to have a larger room for a crib. She told be about upgrading my room. I asked if maybe I could change to a bigger room when I got the kids. As she was looking into this, she said that I could have a handicapped room for no additional cost for the whole stay. This was awesome. When I got to the room and saw it I broke down in tears. It was huge! And there's another gift...the shower has a seat in it (there are no bathtubs at this hotel.) I was wondering how bathing was going to happen in a shower with a child who could not stand. I'm telling you I'm not sure why God is providing everything so perfectly. But it is wonderful.
I talked to our facilitator about the timeframe of this last trip. Here's the plan.
- Tuesday: He will pick up the court decree in the morning (it's official now...they are ours!) Then he will start the process of getting their new birth certificates. That evening he will have me meet him at the vital record's office to sign some paperwork to get the birth certificates.
- Wednesday-Thursday: He will work on getting their Ukrainian passports.
- Friday: Gotcha Day and medical exams!
- Monday-Tuesday: Visas
- Wednesday: Fly home
This is all tentative. But, it is an idea of what to expect.
By the way Brody is out of the hospital! Pray that he will stay well until we get home!
Day 2: This morning I was nearly over my jet lag. Around 8:30 am I had breakfast in the hotel. It is so nice not to have to leave the hotel to eat, although it is expensive. After breakfast I went back to my room and got a message from my translator updating me on our facilitator's progress getting the new birth certificates. In Ukraine, there are no absolutes in dealing with the government. Our facilitator was unsure if they would need me or not. So I waited around the whole day to see if I needed to meet him at the Vital Records office. Around 4:30pm I decided to venture outside the hotel to get something to eat. I decided to try a little place that sold wraps near the hotel. There are many places around the city that sell these wraps. It's a tortilla with white sauce (kind of like ranch), cabbage, carrots and shredded chicken. It's pretty good. I walked around a little then headed back to the hotel. When I got back, I found out that our facilitator was able to get the birth certificates without me. YAY!! Now on to the next step. Tomorrow morning our facilitator will pick me up at around 10 am to get some documents notarized. Then he will start the process of getting the kid's Ukrainian passports.
Day 3: My plans changed a little bit today. Instead of our facilitator picking me up, I met his wife/my translator at a government building to get some documents notarized. There was a problem with one of the documents that he was trying to correct. The government building is only a 20 minute walk down the same street that the hotel is on so I opted to walk. We had been to this same place several weeks ago so I was familiar with the area. I went very early and waited at the McDonalds next door. At 11am, I met my translator in front of the building. She had some disappointing news. The problem that our facilitator was trying to correct was turning out to be a disaster. On the last page of the court decree Jason's middle name is spelt wrong. There is only one letter that is incorrect. On all the previous pages of the court decree it is spelt correctly. But the last page is important because that is where the information for the birth certificates is obtained. So guess what...the birth certificates were wrong as well. Our facilitator contacted the court to inform them about their mistake. They told him it would take 5 business days to correct. Our facilitator was very upset so he was on his way to the court to plead with them to correct it sooner. My translator was apologizing but I told her that I wasn't surprised because I knew that there could be delays. We went ahead and got the documents notarized. These documents are for me to request passports for the children. She asked me when did I want to get the children out of the orphanage. I told her as soon as possible. She wanted me to wait but I want to use this time to bond with the kids. She said that she would talk to her husband/our facilitator and that I could possibly get them as soon as tomorrow. After I left the courthouse I decided to stop by a large grocery store I had seen. I wanted to get snacks and juice for the kids. I was surprised to find very inexpensive toys there. So I bought a few things that I thought would keep them entertained. I spent about $22 on the toys. When I got back to the room I got a phone call from my translator. She had good news. She said that we will have the corrected court decree on Monday. She also said that our facilitator could already start the passport process and that they can be available Monday as well. So if that happens we can possibly get the new birth certificates and medical exams Monday and the visas on Tuesday. So we are still on schedule. It may throw us off one day for our return home. So please continue to pray for the process to move along well so we can get home.
I did find out more information on the circumstances surrounding Brody's orphan status. It is devastating! That's all I can say. I know that we aren't perfect parents but we are going do everything possible to make sure that these children grow up in a loving home. My heart breaks for their past but I am so overjoyed to see what their future holds.
Since this is possibly the last day before I get the kids, I decided to finish up my sightseeing. There were two things I wanted to see. 1. The Golden Gate and 2. The Mosaic Garden. I was able to see both. Plus I got to visit St. Sophia's Cathedral. The Golden Gate and Saint Sophia's were both built in the 11th century. It was amazing to see some of the original construction. I've never seen anything over 1,000 years old before. It was awesome! I also climbed the clock tower at Saint Sophia's. I got some amazing pictures from the top.
Day 4: I overslept today. I hardly ever do this. I think it was all the walking yesterday. Oh and I did stay up until midnight to skype Jason and our kids back home. So I missed the breakfast buffet at the hotel. I decided to go to McDonald's for lunch. I was craving American food pretty bad. I went to the McDonald's next to the train station. It was a terrible decision! I've never seen chaos like that ever before! Even though it was chaotic I somehow managed to get my food in about 3 minutes. Ordering at McDonald's in Ukraine is slightly different than in the states...you don't stand in orderly lines and wait your turn...you push and shove your way to the counter to order. But somehow it works and no one gets upset. If that happened where I'm from I'm sure there would be some cursing and even some fist fights. But like I said, I got my food in 3 minutes.
Day 4: I overslept today. I hardly ever do this. I think it was all the walking yesterday. Oh and I did stay up until midnight to skype Jason and our kids back home. So I missed the breakfast buffet at the hotel. I decided to go to McDonald's for lunch. I was craving American food pretty bad. I went to the McDonald's next to the train station. It was a terrible decision! I've never seen chaos like that ever before! Even though it was chaotic I somehow managed to get my food in about 3 minutes. Ordering at McDonald's in Ukraine is slightly different than in the states...you don't stand in orderly lines and wait your turn...you push and shove your way to the counter to order. But somehow it works and no one gets upset. If that happened where I'm from I'm sure there would be some cursing and even some fist fights. But like I said, I got my food in 3 minutes.
After lunch, I went back to the hotel. My translator messaged to tell me that I wouldn't be getting the kids until Monday. Katya was running a low fever and the doctor wanted her to stay in the orphanage over the weekend so they can watch her. I was a little crushed but it is wonderful that the orphanage staff cares so much about her welfare. Even though the orphanage isn't legally responsible for her anymore. So needless to say, I am bored out of my mind! I guess I'm going to have to find something to do. Today I'm taking it easy. I had a pile of clothes that needed washing. This is the only negative about the hotel...there is no washing machine. So everything gets washed in the sink. But this time around, I do have tons of space in the bathroom to dry the clothes. I included pictures for your enjoyment.
Many of you have commented that you can't believe that I'm doing this trip alone, but I have to admit it's not scary at all. All the Ukrainians I've come in contact with are so friendly and helpful. Of course I am using my common sense and I'm not going places at night and I'm staying aware of my surroundings (Jason's #1 advice for me.) He did ask me not to go to Independence square (where the rioters are.) I was planning to go to the village today to visit the kids, but this made him very nervous so I told him I wouldn't. It's hard being so close but not being able to see them. But I do need to stay safe. Many of you might not know that when I was 21 I moved to Boston all alone for a job. I didn't know anyone. While it was a little scary it was an amazing experience that I treasure. This city is so much like Boston! So it is bringing back a lot of fond memories. But I do miss my family very much and would not like to live this life again. Living in Boston was often very lonely without family. I thank God for giving me my life with Jason and our children. I am so ready to be home getting to know my new life with FOUR children!
Day 5: This afternoon my translator called me to tell me that the psychologist had met with the kids today to tell them about their adoption. Katya was very concerned about leaving the orphanage. Actually "scared to death" is a better description. It's all she has ever known...who can blame her? So to hopefully ease her fears, our facilitator is going to take me to the orphanage to talk to her tomorrow. Please pray that God will give me the words to say. We know that this is best for her but she doesn't know that. We know that if she stayed in the orphanage she would be moved to an institution next year. She would spend the rest of her life there. Institutions are much worse than our nursing homes in America. Can you imagine spending the majority of your life somewhere like that? Regardless of what happens, I will still take the kids from the orphanage on Monday. I just don't want her to feel afraid. Please, please pray for her that God will show her that she is safe with us! Brody is young and he doesn't understand, but if his sister is upset he will be also.
Day 6: Yesterday when I finally got to my hotel room after hobbling 1 mile, I had no idea how God could get me out of this mess. I couldn't put pressure on my ankle without extreme pain. Not 30 minutes later I got the call from my translator about Katya. I was literally helpless. In the next couple of days I had to convince her to come with me and take care of two kids but at the moment I couldn't even walk. All I could do was cry out to God for help and ask everyone to pray. When my husband found out everything, he was ready to hop on the next plane but I told him to wait. From 2 pm until 11 pm yesterday I laid on my back with my leg elevated. I applied peppermint oil every 30 minutes for pain and had a bag of ice on my ankle. All night long I thought of things I could tell Katya and pictures I could show her to convince her that I could be trusted. This morning I woke up with my ankle so much better. I could walk on it with just a little pain. I call that a miracle.
Day 15: (written by Jason ) A Day out with Daddy: Thankfully the kids sleep very well so I was able to recover from the trip and jet lag. This morning we started the day with breakfast at the hotel restaurant. Breakfast was good and the kids did well. I gave them some bacon along with their oatmeal and Katya really enjoyed it so Brody decided he wanted some. He didn't exactly chew it before swallowing so before long we were cleaning throw up off of the table. Now that's a nice way to start the morning. He recovered nicely and ate some yogurt. We then went to the park that Donna raves so much about and it was really nice. After the park we walked to downtown. It was nice to see how clean everything was; there were no more protestor tents, the bricks were back on the sidewalk and most of the burnt building was covered nicely.
Day 5: This afternoon my translator called me to tell me that the psychologist had met with the kids today to tell them about their adoption. Katya was very concerned about leaving the orphanage. Actually "scared to death" is a better description. It's all she has ever known...who can blame her? So to hopefully ease her fears, our facilitator is going to take me to the orphanage to talk to her tomorrow. Please pray that God will give me the words to say. We know that this is best for her but she doesn't know that. We know that if she stayed in the orphanage she would be moved to an institution next year. She would spend the rest of her life there. Institutions are much worse than our nursing homes in America. Can you imagine spending the majority of your life somewhere like that? Regardless of what happens, I will still take the kids from the orphanage on Monday. I just don't want her to feel afraid. Please, please pray for her that God will show her that she is safe with us! Brody is young and he doesn't understand, but if his sister is upset he will be also.
In addition to all this, I hurt my ankle earlier today. It was fine for about an hour after I hurt it, but then it got worse and worse. By the time I got back to the hotel, I could barely walk. Of course I didn't bring any medicine for me. I did bring infant Tylenol, so I took some. Then I asked the hotel staff to bring me some ice (thank goodness I'm in a hotel)! I did bring my essential oils, so I've applied several different types every 30 minutes or so. I've had it elevated for several hours now, and it is getting better. It hasn't swelled any. Pray that it is much better by tomorrow. I don't want anything to mess up my time with Katya.
Before all this happened I was able to see a few more sights of the city.
1. Kievo-Pecherska Larva. This is Orthodox monastery that began in 1015 in a cave. Later the monastery moved above ground into elaborate buildings. The caves were then used to house the tombs of some of the monks who had died. The bodies of these monks have been preserved very well over time. It was beautiful walking around looking at all the gorgeous buildings. I didn't care too much for the cave though. I have a little claustrophobia and a few times I almost lost it. But the cave I went into wasn't very long. It only took a few minutes to walk through. I did have to wear a head covering and an apron (because I wasn't wearing a skirt).
2. Mother of the Fatherland. This massive statue was built while Ukraine was still part of the Soviet Union. It is a war memorial. Under the statue is the museum of the Great Patriotic War (German-Soviet War from 1941-1945). It was amazing seeing the huge statue but the museum was all in Russian so I didn't get too much out of it.
Day 6: Yesterday when I finally got to my hotel room after hobbling 1 mile, I had no idea how God could get me out of this mess. I couldn't put pressure on my ankle without extreme pain. Not 30 minutes later I got the call from my translator about Katya. I was literally helpless. In the next couple of days I had to convince her to come with me and take care of two kids but at the moment I couldn't even walk. All I could do was cry out to God for help and ask everyone to pray. When my husband found out everything, he was ready to hop on the next plane but I told him to wait. From 2 pm until 11 pm yesterday I laid on my back with my leg elevated. I applied peppermint oil every 30 minutes for pain and had a bag of ice on my ankle. All night long I thought of things I could tell Katya and pictures I could show her to convince her that I could be trusted. This morning I woke up with my ankle so much better. I could walk on it with just a little pain. I call that a miracle.
At 10 am, our facilitator picked me up at the hotel. We drove straight to the orphanage. Katya was in the "sick children" building. When they brought her out she immediately made eye contact with me and wanted me to hold her. This was a huge relief! Our facilitator and the caregiver explained to her that I was her mama and that she and her brother were going to America to be apart of my family. She replied "I will miss the orphanage". I told her that I understood. I sat down with her in my lap and I showed her all the pictures I had selected to show her. Pictures of her new sister and brother, our home, her bedroom, the mural I painted in her room, the swing set, the community pool. I also showed her pictures of the hotel room, the toys I got her, her cute clothes and the stroller. Our facilitator translated for me. She was excited. I then showed her that I had Russian cartoons on the Ipad. I also showed her the Nabi tablet we got for her. She loved it. She grabbed it and started playing. She played on it for about 20 minutes. She hugged me a couple of times but you could tell she was a little nervous. The caregiver said that she thought she wouldn't cry when we take her away, but maybe afterwards. This is going to be a huge adjustment for her. She asked how long until she was to leave the orphanage. We told her two days and she seemed alright with it.
After visiting with her we went to see Brody. He was in the back playground. As I walked towards him, his face lit up and he said with joy, "Mama"! He ran as fast as he could towards me. I scooped him up and he gave me a huge hug. Our facilitator told him that he has going to America with me. He was absolutely delighted. I asked our facilitator to tell him that we would fly on an airplane. He really liked this! I must have gotten about 20 hugs from him during my visit. They told me I could take him to the front playground. As soon as I put him down, he ran as fast as he could to the gate yelling "Americo!!" "Americo!!". I felt so bad, he wanted to leave now. When we explained to him that it would be 2 more days until he left, he was crushed. But later when we left he seemed ok in the arms of his caregiver. Katya is still recovering from her virus and since it is the weekend the orphanage director isn't there to sign the necessary paperwork for us to get the kids today. So we all wait for Monday to come.
As for me...I learned my lesson. I will take it easy until Monday. I have to be in good shape to take care of these kids. I can't wait!
Day 7: The good news is that my ankle is completely healed. The bad news is that I'm now sick. Last night my throat started getting sore. This morning it was pretty bad. Last night and all day today I doctored it up with my essential oils. By 5 pm the throat wasn't sore anymore but I had terrible sinus/nasal drainage and pressure. I decided to go to a pharmacy down the road. The pharmacist didn't speak English. I tried to use google translate to ask for a decongestant. She didn't understand. I motioned to her that my nose was running and she showed me three nasal sprays. I went with the most expensive hoping it was the most powerful. When I got back to the hotel I looked up the spray online to make sure it looked safe and to read the instructions. After the first dose it seems to be helping. I am simply miserable. Please pray that I am better by tomorrow morning. Tomorrow is finally gotcha day and I am feeling terrible. Not how I envisioned it at all.
Day 8: Gotcha Day!!! This morning I woke up a little better than last night. Most of the symptoms had improved. At 10 am our facilitator and his wife/my translator picked me up. Along the way, we stopped at a pharmacy to buy a few more medicines for me. When we got to the orphanage we stopped by the administration office. The director was out sick so the head nurse gave us the forms we needed to sign. After that the psychologist talked to me for a long while. Basically telling me things I already knew about how to deal with the children. She really wanted me to bring the kids back in a few days to say goodbye again. My translator and I both agreed that wasn't a good idea for bonding. Even though we told her this she still told Katya later on that we would come back. My translator was very upset with her. When we went to the kid's building they were outside playing. Katya was sitting beside her favorite caregiver. Brody was running around saying "Americo" again. They brought the kids inside to put them in the clothes I had brought. I was able to go inside with them. I took pictures of their beds and play area while they changed them. While they were changing her, Katya said she was hungry. So they asked if they could feed them before we left. Of course I said yes. This was a great opportunity for me to see what exactly they eat. They had soup, pasta, cranberry sauce and a fish patty. Both of them loved the soup. Good thing because the hotel restaurant has several types of soup. After they ate they were both given a backpack with their belongings. The kids said their goodbyes and we loaded them up in the car. On our way back to the hotel Katya was getting more and more nervous. She asked several times when were we going back to the groupa (orphanage). Each time she got more upset (We were very upset that the psychologist had lied to her). At one point she said she was getting sick. So our facilitator stopped the car and we got her out. We stood outside for awhile. Each time we asked her if she was ready to get back in the car she said no. She said that she wanted to stay on the side of the road all day and night. At that point we knew she simply didn't want to go with us. So we all loaded back in the car. She was ok the rest of the trip. When we got back to the hotel, the kids sat on the bed with the juice I fixed them. Then Katya asked for my phone so I gave them their Nabi tablets. About 30 minutes later we skyped Daddy. That was a great moment. They are definitely keeping me very busy. In about an hour I'm going to bring them to the restaurant for dinner and I may take them for a walk.
Day 7: The good news is that my ankle is completely healed. The bad news is that I'm now sick. Last night my throat started getting sore. This morning it was pretty bad. Last night and all day today I doctored it up with my essential oils. By 5 pm the throat wasn't sore anymore but I had terrible sinus/nasal drainage and pressure. I decided to go to a pharmacy down the road. The pharmacist didn't speak English. I tried to use google translate to ask for a decongestant. She didn't understand. I motioned to her that my nose was running and she showed me three nasal sprays. I went with the most expensive hoping it was the most powerful. When I got back to the hotel I looked up the spray online to make sure it looked safe and to read the instructions. After the first dose it seems to be helping. I am simply miserable. Please pray that I am better by tomorrow morning. Tomorrow is finally gotcha day and I am feeling terrible. Not how I envisioned it at all.
Day 8: Gotcha Day!!! This morning I woke up a little better than last night. Most of the symptoms had improved. At 10 am our facilitator and his wife/my translator picked me up. Along the way, we stopped at a pharmacy to buy a few more medicines for me. When we got to the orphanage we stopped by the administration office. The director was out sick so the head nurse gave us the forms we needed to sign. After that the psychologist talked to me for a long while. Basically telling me things I already knew about how to deal with the children. She really wanted me to bring the kids back in a few days to say goodbye again. My translator and I both agreed that wasn't a good idea for bonding. Even though we told her this she still told Katya later on that we would come back. My translator was very upset with her. When we went to the kid's building they were outside playing. Katya was sitting beside her favorite caregiver. Brody was running around saying "Americo" again. They brought the kids inside to put them in the clothes I had brought. I was able to go inside with them. I took pictures of their beds and play area while they changed them. While they were changing her, Katya said she was hungry. So they asked if they could feed them before we left. Of course I said yes. This was a great opportunity for me to see what exactly they eat. They had soup, pasta, cranberry sauce and a fish patty. Both of them loved the soup. Good thing because the hotel restaurant has several types of soup. After they ate they were both given a backpack with their belongings. The kids said their goodbyes and we loaded them up in the car. On our way back to the hotel Katya was getting more and more nervous. She asked several times when were we going back to the groupa (orphanage). Each time she got more upset (We were very upset that the psychologist had lied to her). At one point she said she was getting sick. So our facilitator stopped the car and we got her out. We stood outside for awhile. Each time we asked her if she was ready to get back in the car she said no. She said that she wanted to stay on the side of the road all day and night. At that point we knew she simply didn't want to go with us. So we all loaded back in the car. She was ok the rest of the trip. When we got back to the hotel, the kids sat on the bed with the juice I fixed them. Then Katya asked for my phone so I gave them their Nabi tablets. About 30 minutes later we skyped Daddy. That was a great moment. They are definitely keeping me very busy. In about an hour I'm going to bring them to the restaurant for dinner and I may take them for a walk.
Post a few hours later:
Both kids are asleep. Wow talk about a rough last three hours! We went to dinner at the hotel restaurant. After I ordered Katya burst into tears. She cried uncontrollably. So I asked for our food to go. The manager came out to help. I explained to him about the circumstances. He talked to her but she continued to cry. I then lost it right in front of the manager. It was absolutely heart gripping to see her grieve so bad. We finally made it back to the room. I distracted her by giving them a shower. Afterwards she seemed better. I laid down beside her and sang to her. She started sucking her thumb and calmed down. At first the kids were on the same bed but I could see that was not going to work. The lounge chair in the room makes a little bed. Almost exactly like Katya's bed at the orphanage. I asked her if she would like to sleep there (to get away from her brother) and she said yes. She cuddled up sucking her thumb and was asleep in about 15 minutes. Brody was absolutely wild so I had to put him in the crib. He didn't like it but it was similiar to what he was use to. He flinged around and fought sleep hard but he was gone in about 30 minutes.
Please pray for us all, Katya especially. It is so hard to see her suffer.
Day 9: The kids slept 11 1/2 hours last night. This was such a wonderful blessing! Both of them woke up with smiles. After our experience at dinner last night, I decided not to try the breakfast buffet. We had dry cereal and juice instead. The kids don't eat much at all but they drink tons of water and juice. After breakfast I got a taxi to bring us to the zoo. It's only about a mile or so down the road. We spent the morning looking at animals. The kids had a great time. We ate lunch at the zoo. I got a kids meal for both kids. I should have only got one. They only ate a few French fries. I'm learning. I decided to walk back to the hotel. It took about 45 minutes. Going to the zoo was a good way to distract Katya. We got back around 1:30 pm. I think we'll spend the rest of the day inside. We had our translator order us some pizza for delivery (by the way...she is amazing!!!). The kids took a couple small bites and they were done.
Day 10: This morning the kids woke me up a little before 7am. We had a restless night. The kids were asleep by 7pm last night again (I'm loving this). Around 9:30pm, I was awaken by some very loud noises in the room next to ours. I heard Katya stir and then she said in a sweet soft voice "Mama". I said "yes" as I immediately went to check on her. I put my hand on her head and said "it's ok". That's all she wanted...to know that I was there. This was a wonderful sign to me that she is getting use to me. Later around 11:10pm the same noises happened again (I think the people were drunk). This time I had to call the reception desk to complain. Shortly after the call the noises stopped.. I never heard them again. This time our Brody had stirred. Every time he stirred last night (which was a lot) he would quickly rock back and forth over and over almost violently. It scared me. I would go over and rub his back and tell him it was ok but he wouldn't stop until a minute or so later. I read that this is a self-comforting action. This makes sense because I heard that at bedtime at the orphanage the children are pretty much left unattended to. This explains why the kids go to sleep at night with no problems and why they sleep so long.
Day 11: Today I wanted to stay in because we were suppose to meet our facilitator at the passport agency next door around noon. Around 9am, Katya started pointing outside. She asked me over and over if we could go outside. This is what triggered a grieving meltdown yesterday, so I gave in and we went for a walk. I'm still quite sick and all this running around is taking a toll on me so I decided we wouldn't go far. We got back around 10:30 am. Shortly after we got back she had the worst meltdown so far. She cried and cried violently. Nothing I did helped. After what seemed like an eternity of crying I was successful in distracting her. The distraction was me finishing Brody's haircut. She was good for a few hours and then she cried a little in the afternoon. I'm trying to make a list of triggers. I think the sandboxes yesterday reminded her of the orphanage. So when we came back to the hotel she immediately wanted to go back out. I gave in last night and took her back outside to get dinner. I think she thinks somehow she'll get back to the orphanage on our long walks. She has the habit of tattling about everything Brody does wrong (I'm talking a hundred times a day... it is so draining!). I have been trying to explain to her that she doesn't need to do this every single time. She wants me to do something about it every time. So every time she begins to cry in a grieving meltdown it is always triggered by one of Brody's disobedient actions. Yesterday it was when he turned off the tv and then later when he shut the bathroom door (this freaks her out!). It starts with her crying about what he is doing and then it quickly turns into violently crying for her nanny. I guess it's just going to take time. Staying inside today really helped with us bonding. After the crying spells, she really started talking up a storm. They both have had a good time playing today. Around 4 pm we went on a longer walk and got ice cream. When we got back she was fine, no crying.
Day 9: The kids slept 11 1/2 hours last night. This was such a wonderful blessing! Both of them woke up with smiles. After our experience at dinner last night, I decided not to try the breakfast buffet. We had dry cereal and juice instead. The kids don't eat much at all but they drink tons of water and juice. After breakfast I got a taxi to bring us to the zoo. It's only about a mile or so down the road. We spent the morning looking at animals. The kids had a great time. We ate lunch at the zoo. I got a kids meal for both kids. I should have only got one. They only ate a few French fries. I'm learning. I decided to walk back to the hotel. It took about 45 minutes. Going to the zoo was a good way to distract Katya. We got back around 1:30 pm. I think we'll spend the rest of the day inside. We had our translator order us some pizza for delivery (by the way...she is amazing!!!). The kids took a couple small bites and they were done.
Day 10: This morning the kids woke me up a little before 7am. We had a restless night. The kids were asleep by 7pm last night again (I'm loving this). Around 9:30pm, I was awaken by some very loud noises in the room next to ours. I heard Katya stir and then she said in a sweet soft voice "Mama". I said "yes" as I immediately went to check on her. I put my hand on her head and said "it's ok". That's all she wanted...to know that I was there. This was a wonderful sign to me that she is getting use to me. Later around 11:10pm the same noises happened again (I think the people were drunk). This time I had to call the reception desk to complain. Shortly after the call the noises stopped.. I never heard them again. This time our Brody had stirred. Every time he stirred last night (which was a lot) he would quickly rock back and forth over and over almost violently. It scared me. I would go over and rub his back and tell him it was ok but he wouldn't stop until a minute or so later. I read that this is a self-comforting action. This makes sense because I heard that at bedtime at the orphanage the children are pretty much left unattended to. This explains why the kids go to sleep at night with no problems and why they sleep so long.
I decided to give the breakfast buffet a chance this morning. It went very well. The kids love oatmeal! The staff at the restaurant were so nice and helpful. They even let us take two to-go boxes to the room with us. One of the things I love about staying in a hotel instead of an apartment is that our room gets cleaned daily. You wouldn't believe how nasty these kids can get a room in one day. Around 9 am we set off to the park. I had seen a playground in the botanical gardens I wanted to let the kids play at. It was nice. We played for about 30 minutes. When I had to chase a never stopping running little boy, I decided it was time to move on. Thank goodness for stroller seat belts that are childproof. He is wild sometimes! After leaving the botanical gardens, we went up a street that was extremely steep. My congestion has moved to my chest so my breathing is a little limited, so I had to take it slow with the stroller. Needless to say, we won't be going up that street again. At the top of the street we found a wonderful park. My absolute favorite so far! I got the kids a raspberry sherbet popsicle there. They loved it. There was a great playground in this park. The kids loved the swings and the sandbox. We met a very nice mom with her little girl there. She realized I spoke English so she began speaking to me in English. I was able to tell her a little bit of our story until Brody started running away from the playground full force. I caught him and I decided it was time to move on (maybe he will start to realize that every time he runs away we leave the fun thing we were doing). We then ate lunch in that same park. While eating I met an elderly lady who spoke English. On the way back to the hotel, we bought some bananas at a fruit stand. Bananas are another favorite of the kids. Once we got back to the hotel I gave Brody's hair a little trim. It was getting a little too long.
My translator updated me on our facilitator's progress with the adoption things. Yesterday he got the updated court decree, the corrected birth certificates, and he was also able to get something required from the passport agency (he thought this was going to take a while). Today he submitted all those documents to the passport agency in the city. They said that they will have tax ID numbers for the kids tomorrow by 11am. So tomorrow we will go to the passport agency for the kids to be scanned. Not sure exactly what this involves. So everything is lining up for us the leave next Wednesday as long as we don't run into anymore problems.
Katya had another meltdown this afternoon. Please continue to pray for her.
Right before she went to sleep tonight she uncovered herself and asked me to tuck her in. She loves to be tucked in.
Day 11: Today I wanted to stay in because we were suppose to meet our facilitator at the passport agency next door around noon. Around 9am, Katya started pointing outside. She asked me over and over if we could go outside. This is what triggered a grieving meltdown yesterday, so I gave in and we went for a walk. I'm still quite sick and all this running around is taking a toll on me so I decided we wouldn't go far. We got back around 10:30 am. Shortly after we got back she had the worst meltdown so far. She cried and cried violently. Nothing I did helped. After what seemed like an eternity of crying I was successful in distracting her. The distraction was me finishing Brody's haircut. She was good for a few hours and then she cried a little in the afternoon. I'm trying to make a list of triggers. I think the sandboxes yesterday reminded her of the orphanage. So when we came back to the hotel she immediately wanted to go back out. I gave in last night and took her back outside to get dinner. I think she thinks somehow she'll get back to the orphanage on our long walks. She has the habit of tattling about everything Brody does wrong (I'm talking a hundred times a day... it is so draining!). I have been trying to explain to her that she doesn't need to do this every single time. She wants me to do something about it every time. So every time she begins to cry in a grieving meltdown it is always triggered by one of Brody's disobedient actions. Yesterday it was when he turned off the tv and then later when he shut the bathroom door (this freaks her out!). It starts with her crying about what he is doing and then it quickly turns into violently crying for her nanny. I guess it's just going to take time. Staying inside today really helped with us bonding. After the crying spells, she really started talking up a storm. They both have had a good time playing today. Around 4 pm we went on a longer walk and got ice cream. When we got back she was fine, no crying.
We didn't get to go to the passport agency today. The tax ID numbers were not ready at 11am. They told our facilitator to check back this evening. If we get them this evening we will get the kids scanned tomorrow and do medical exams tomorrow. I'm hoping this doesn't throw us off.
Day 12: We spent most of the day waiting to see if we needed to go to the passport agency to get the kids "scanned". It never happend, but we did get their tax codes confirmed by the end of the day (thank you God)! So here is our schedule now (let's see if we actually stick to it).
Day 13: I decided to spend most of the day walking around the city today. It was so neat to see everyone preparing for Independence Day tomorrow. Our favorite park even had a stage set up with dancers and singers performing. I'm glad we were here to witness this celebration.
- Sunday - Jason gets here!!
- Monday - Independance Day - everything closed
- Tuesday - kids get scanned, get passports
- Wedneday - medical exams & embassy
- Thursday - possible embassy
- Friday or Saturday fly home
Day 13: I decided to spend most of the day walking around the city today. It was so neat to see everyone preparing for Independence Day tomorrow. Our favorite park even had a stage set up with dancers and singers performing. I'm glad we were here to witness this celebration.
We braved the hotel restaurant for dinner. The kids did great this time. Brody loved the Borsch and Katya loved the Potato pancakes (both Ukrainian specialties according to the menu). So grateful!
Day 14: Independence Day! I almost forgot to post today. Jason made it safely to Ukraine. I am so happy he's here. Before he got here, we went to the Military Parade downtown.
Day 14: Independence Day! I almost forgot to post today. Jason made it safely to Ukraine. I am so happy he's here. Before he got here, we went to the Military Parade downtown.
Katya is doing much better. No crying spells for I think 3 days now.
Day 15: (written by Jason ) A Day out with Daddy: Thankfully the kids sleep very well so I was able to recover from the trip and jet lag. This morning we started the day with breakfast at the hotel restaurant. Breakfast was good and the kids did well. I gave them some bacon along with their oatmeal and Katya really enjoyed it so Brody decided he wanted some. He didn't exactly chew it before swallowing so before long we were cleaning throw up off of the table. Now that's a nice way to start the morning. He recovered nicely and ate some yogurt. We then went to the park that Donna raves so much about and it was really nice. After the park we walked to downtown. It was nice to see how clean everything was; there were no more protestor tents, the bricks were back on the sidewalk and most of the burnt building was covered nicely.
When we returned to the hotel we decided to try a nap. Brody climbed up beside me on the bed and I put my arm under his back then he pulled my hand up on his stomach. He seemed to feel very at ease and secure with me holding him and he was asleep within a couple of minutes. This may have been the first time he's gone to sleep without rocking back and forth. Katya decided a nap was not for her but still rested with us while Donna went out for groceries. Tomorrow we are going to the passport agency to get the children scanned (whatever that means).
Day 16: We finally got the passport scans done today around 11am. We paid to have our passports within 2-3 days from the scan time. We are going to the office on Thursday afternoon to get the passports. Please pray that they are ready by then! Our 2nd embassy appointment is Friday morning. The embassy closes at noon on Fridays. I asked the embassy if there is any way that they could have the visas ready in the same day. They said that typically they do not have them ready in the same day but that they would try their very best. This is another huge prayer request! If we get the visas Friday we can fly home Saturday. If we do not, Jason will have to fly home Sunday and I will stay to pick up the visas Monday and fly home with the kids on Tuesday. We need your prayers like never before. We want to get home so bad. Staying over the weekend will be so hard on me. Not to mention the flight alone with the kids.
Day 17: Our facilitator picked us up a little past 8 am to get the kids' medical exams done. The whole process took less than 2 hours. The medical center was very nice but it was small and crowded.
Day 16: We finally got the passport scans done today around 11am. We paid to have our passports within 2-3 days from the scan time. We are going to the office on Thursday afternoon to get the passports. Please pray that they are ready by then! Our 2nd embassy appointment is Friday morning. The embassy closes at noon on Fridays. I asked the embassy if there is any way that they could have the visas ready in the same day. They said that typically they do not have them ready in the same day but that they would try their very best. This is another huge prayer request! If we get the visas Friday we can fly home Saturday. If we do not, Jason will have to fly home Sunday and I will stay to pick up the visas Monday and fly home with the kids on Tuesday. We need your prayers like never before. We want to get home so bad. Staying over the weekend will be so hard on me. Not to mention the flight alone with the kids.
Day 17: Our facilitator picked us up a little past 8 am to get the kids' medical exams done. The whole process took less than 2 hours. The medical center was very nice but it was small and crowded.
So here is what happens next...
- Best case senario:
Thursday evening we get the kids' passports then our facilitator will pick up the packet of docunents from the medical center that we need for the embassy. Friday morning we go to the embassy at 8 am to give them all the needed paperwork for the kids' visas. The embassy gives us the kids' visas before they close at noon. We fly home Saturday.
**both of the next senarios will require the kids and I to fly home without Jason (he has to be home monday to take care of Clark & Callie)**
- "Not so best" case senario #1:
- "Not so best" case senario #2:
So needless to say the first senario is ideal. Please friends pray!!
Day 18: Well we have bad news...The passports won't be ready until tomorrow. So I'll be flying home with the kids solo next week (most likely Wednesday). This trip was almost as long as the first trip. Over 3 weeks. It was totally unexpected. I was thinking 2 weeks tops. I'm trying to see the bright side...more time getting to know my two new kids.
Day 19: We have passports! This morning we went on a walk around the city. This is my husband's last day, so he wanted to walk to Saint Andrew's descent to look for some nesting dolls. Last time we were there they were out of the certain football team ones that we wanted. Sadly, they are still out. After that we walked through the mosaic park. We ate lunch al fresco at a restaurant across the street from our hotel.
Day 20: Jason left the hotel at 2am this morning. We sure are going to miss him! Only three more full days hopefully until we get on the plane to come home. When the kids and I got back from breakfast, Brody was asking where daddy was. So sweet.
Day 21: Today we repeated what we did yesterday but we left about an hour earlier. It was warmer today. The kids were terrible today. I'm not sure why. It started at the playground. We started in the sandbox. Well Katya didn't like that. She wanted to swing first. I told her that we would do the swings next (a photographer was taking pictures in that area). She pouted and asked over and over. After the photographer was done we went to the swings. Later it was lunch time. So I went to see if I could find something in the park. Now here is one of my pet peeves about street vendors in Ukraine (my experience at least)...9 times out of 10 if you see a picture of a food item posted for sell on their cart they don't have it. Very frustrating! If you don't sell it don't advertise it. Meanwhile the kids are getting very impatient (even tough I gave them a snack 30 minutes before). So finally I found us some lunch. We sat down and I gave the kids their lunch. Katya ate pretty good. Brody did not. He wanted his chips first. I told him that he had to eat his lunch first then he could have his chips. He did not like this. After she finished she got her chips. He pitched a terrible tantrum. He still wouldn't finish his lunch so I packed his food up and began putting a screaming little boy in the stroller. By the way, he ate this same lunch fine before. I wasn't giving in. I decided to take a quieter way back. On the way our stroller broke. We can still use it but he has to stand up. So I guess our long walks are over. Once we made it back I decided everyone (including myself needed a nap).
We're home at last!!!! All I can say is that today has been the hardest day of my entire life so far. I'm so glad we are home for good but getting here was terrible. Brodyy and his energetic self were no match for 12 plus hours of flight time.
Day 18: Well we have bad news...The passports won't be ready until tomorrow. So I'll be flying home with the kids solo next week (most likely Wednesday). This trip was almost as long as the first trip. Over 3 weeks. It was totally unexpected. I was thinking 2 weeks tops. I'm trying to see the bright side...more time getting to know my two new kids.
Day 19: We have passports! This morning we went on a walk around the city. This is my husband's last day, so he wanted to walk to Saint Andrew's descent to look for some nesting dolls. Last time we were there they were out of the certain football team ones that we wanted. Sadly, they are still out. After that we walked through the mosaic park. We ate lunch al fresco at a restaurant across the street from our hotel.
A little after 2 pm we got word that the passports are ready. Yay!!! Our facilitator and Jason went to go get them. We can't go to the embassy today because we are missing the envelopes from the medical center. The medical center was closed today so we were unable to get them.
Jason flys out very early tomorrow morning. We just can't bear to be apart from our kids back at home anymore. So Jason will stay with them next week until we return.
All that is left to do is to get the visas from the embassy. They are closed Monday for Labor day. So we have an appointment Tuesday morning. I am hoping we are able to get the visas that same day. Just a few more days...
Day 20: Jason left the hotel at 2am this morning. We sure are going to miss him! Only three more full days hopefully until we get on the plane to come home. When the kids and I got back from breakfast, Brody was asking where daddy was. So sweet.
To make the time go by, we went to our favorite park and spent a few hours there. The kids love the swings and the sand! Most of the families at the park today were speaking English. It was so weird to hear English instead of Russian. It sounded like a bunch of expats. This park is so nice! There is a huge blow up slide and pony rides. The kids are not ready to do either but it was fun watching the other kids having fun as we played on the playground. For lunch we ate hot dogs. the kids ate pretty well! Two weeks ago the kids didn't eat much, but now they are bottomless pits. Katya asks for food constantly. After lunch we got ice cream. the lady who sold us the ice cream was wondering why I only spoke English but my kids spoke Ukrainian ( I'm sure many people wonder this}. I used Google translate to tell her that I adopted them. She was amazed and she put her hand on her heart. She was so sweet! On the way back to the hotel, I found a used "Jesus Storybook Bible" in Russian for sell at a street vendor. I bought it for 30 UAH ($2.20 USD). I know we can't read it, but maybe the kids will learn to read Russian someday. We were back at the hotel by 1pm. We're attempting a nap right now.
The kids are doing very well. Katya hasn't cried for her nanny in over a week now. Sometimes I hear her say she loves me in Ukrainian. That makes my heart melt. Both kids have some behavioral issues that I'm trying to keep at by. Brody spits, sometimes bites, kits, and is into everything. Katya tattles, and is very defiant. They are getting better, Katya is learning English quick.
The kids are doing very well. Katya hasn't cried for her nanny in over a week now. Sometimes I hear her say she loves me in Ukrainian. That makes my heart melt. Both kids have some behavioral issues that I'm trying to keep at by. Brody spits, sometimes bites, kits, and is into everything. Katya tattles, and is very defiant. They are getting better, Katya is learning English quick.
On a positive note, I booked our flight home yesterday. We will arrive in Atlanta around 3 pm on Wednesday. I decided to go ahead and book it after talking to some friends about the visa process. They said they got their visas at the 2nd appointment. So it looks like we should have our visas Tuesday morning. The earliest flight out was early the next morning. I can't wait to be home!
Day 22: We took it easy and stayed around the hotel today. After breakfast we watched a parade outside of our hotel room. The kids loved it. I found out that it was at a military school and today is their first day of school. So they have a parade on the first day of school. After the parade we went on a short walk around the block. When we got back, My translator messaged me that our facilitator was coming to bring the documents. He came about 10 minutes later with gifts and the documents. He and his wife gave the kids some toys and they gave our family a beautiful Ukrainian angel ornament. It is beautiful. I may have to display it year around. He told the kids and I goodbye. This is when it really started to sink in that we are actually leaving soon!
Day 23: A really quick update. We went for our embassy appointment this morning. After the appointment they told me to come back at 2 pm to pick up the visas. Instead of going back to the hotel we stayed in the area. We got our visas 15 minutes before 2 pm. It was a wonderful feeling! We leave the hotel for the airport at 2 am in the morning.
Day 22: We took it easy and stayed around the hotel today. After breakfast we watched a parade outside of our hotel room. The kids loved it. I found out that it was at a military school and today is their first day of school. So they have a parade on the first day of school. After the parade we went on a short walk around the block. When we got back, My translator messaged me that our facilitator was coming to bring the documents. He came about 10 minutes later with gifts and the documents. He and his wife gave the kids some toys and they gave our family a beautiful Ukrainian angel ornament. It is beautiful. I may have to display it year around. He told the kids and I goodbye. This is when it really started to sink in that we are actually leaving soon!
For dinner we braved the hotel restaurant again. The kids are getting wilder each time we go. Brody grabs everything. So I immediately remove everything from his reach. Katya watches him and copies what he does, so I remove everything from her reach also. Then as soon as a waitress gets in sight, She is calling her out loud. She tells the waitress what she wants before I have a chance to order. All the waitresses are so nice and they know us very well now. So they are so sweet to answer all of her numerous questions. Every time she sees the waitress walk past she tells her that she is hungry and that she wants the food now. You'd think this girl never gets fed. She is so impatient. Meanwhile our little boy can't control his energy and proceeds to do everything he's not suppose to do. He is just as impatient. In the orphanage they got their food immediately when it was time to eat so this is totally different for them. Also they were use to communicating with the ones who served them openly. That's exactly what Katya does. She doesn't know it's inappropriate to beg the waitress for food. I hope the waitresses truly don't mind. One other thing is that the kids think every adult will talk to them if they call out to them. So if we walk past someone they call out to them every time. Most people don't acknowledge them. The kids don't understand. In the orphanage all the adults who they saw talked to them. It's kind of sad.
Tonight we watched some of Chitty, Chitty, Bang, Bang. The kids love it! I think the evenings are my favorite time of the day. They settle down and we cuddle up and watch a movie together (well about 30 minutes of a movie). The kids ask to take a bath, brush their teeth and go to sleep. That's craziness to me. But it will help out at bedtime once we're home. Our other two back home are the opposite. Just one more day!
Day 23: A really quick update. We went for our embassy appointment this morning. After the appointment they told me to come back at 2 pm to pick up the visas. Instead of going back to the hotel we stayed in the area. We got our visas 15 minutes before 2 pm. It was a wonderful feeling! We leave the hotel for the airport at 2 am in the morning.
We're home at last!!!! All I can say is that today has been the hardest day of my entire life so far. I'm so glad we are home for good but getting here was terrible. Brodyy and his energetic self were no match for 12 plus hours of flight time.
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